If you are single and just entering the world of internet dating, here are a few suggestions: Finally, dating sites are not panaceas; they are just another way to connect with other people. Push away all the ‘What if I…’ type questions; Remind yourself of the positives. A first date has the potential for future love and happiness. That, I think, is the most important key for finding someone and for a lot of things in life.Go online, sure, but remember to bring your honesty, integrity, values, and principles with you. The first time I began, I was a beginner at it and I was living at home and I didn't have a lot of confidence and it didn't work out.The central premise of the Rules is that if a man likes you, he will approach you.Any communication you make independently of that is an initiation of contact that would never have happened were it left up to him.Authors Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider turned the dating world upside down with their 1995 bestseller "The Rules," telling women that they needed to play hard to get to reel in Mr. In their new book, "The Rules For Online Dating," they apply their relationship advice to cyberspace providing a list of do's and don'ts for successful computer romances. The title of their book explains its whole premise: "The Rules for Online Dating: Capturing the Heart of Mr.Essentially, The New Rules deals with social media and our increased interconnectivity by ignoring it all and pretending humanity was at a comms high around the time Rapunzel was locked up in that tower Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider practice what they preach.
Fein and Schneider have even enlisted the help of their teenage daughters, to add their own take on romance in an over-connected era."These days, it doesn't matter whether a guy calls, texts or emails to ask you out," goes one of their hymeneal homilies, "as long as he asks you right." "Technology is great," continues Schneider. But it's the overuse of technology that is the problem. They're addicted to answering guys back in nanoseconds and they're not getting dates.As the gurus who invented call screening, curtailing any contact that isn't face-to-face as quickly as possible, and good old-fashioned ignoring, this strikes me as particularly apt.The New Rules: The dating dos and don'ts for the digital generation, (£9.99, Piatkus) published this month, offers their signature sagacious take on the grey area where sex and cyberspace intersect.This, the authors argue, is what means women are disappointed again and again by men who are perfectly happy to accept your advances (and all the, ahem, perks they might bring), but who won't follow through with a second date or who can't commit."The Rules are about boundaries and self-esteem," says Schneider."That is not repressive: that is called self-control and smart, effective behaviour.""We are feminists," adds Fein. We say go ahead and run a marathon and buy a condo and start a new business, just don't chase guys.