The rapid warm-up is always a sign of shallow emotions which later cause the Loser to detach from you as quickly as they committed.” Which is exactly what Drew Peterson (and others like him) did after seducing each of his partners. The physical outbursts towards inanimate objects function as a form of intimidation.
As easily as he attached to them initially, he later detached from them to pursue his next conquest(s). Through such behavior, Losers show their targets that they’re capable of doing the same thing to them. Losers generally prefer flings and short-term affairs, which provide constant new thrills.
Such outbursts also train the partners to become gradually habituated to acts of violence. They also engage in long-term relationships, however, to gain more lasting control over certain more promising targets.
It’s nearly impossible to control strong human beings who have clear boundaries and a healthy self-esteem.
The cycle starts when they are intentionally hurtful and mean.
Yet, Carver cautions, this seemingly positive sign is, in fact, also negative.
Typically, in less than a few weeks of dating you’ll hear that you’re the love of their life, they want to be with you forever, and they want to marry you.
You’ll receive gifts, a variety of promises, and be showered with their attention and nice gestures.” Drew Peterson and other dangerous seducers wouldn’t get any partners, much less attractive young women, if they showed their true colors from the very beginning. They deluge their targets with flattery, promises and gifts at the beginning of the relationship.
You will withdraw from friends and family, prompting them to become upset with you.” 6. As we recall, Drew Peterson bought his wife a motorcycle and expensive jewelry even during the period of time when he was criticizing her, throwing her up against the wall, isolating her from her loved ones, accusing her of infidelity and calling her pejorative names.
If they were consistently mean or violent, psychopaths wouldn’t be able to hold on to their partners. Carver observes, “The Loser cycles from mean to sweet and back again.